a shot of perk

wow, all is not desolation, like a DCFC CD,
but the last entries of this blog read exactly so.
lest you shy away thinking I'm writing from teenage angst, I've a word of solace for you! in fact, I am well into my 20s. so it's later in life angst, but i think that word's a little harsh anyhow. why not something more charitable, musings or vignettes perhaps. Thoughts spun off in the frenzy of emotion. Of course there is a reason for this post, as with all others, some rankling feeling that bursts out a hurly mess. In the moment it seems so tangible, moving. Cause for a post on the blog! And a year later, there is barely a recollection of what could possibly have been the source of that unsightly collection of words. oof.
ha! I guess I'm not doing so well to keep up with my aspirational title. perk i prescribed and instead i give snark...no I didn't mean for that to be a catchy rhyme-ish thing, just be quiet.
well, i guess I don't quite know what perk means. if it means subject matter fit for a self-help book, then I may as well erase that title, I don't want to be accused of misrepresentation or anything. And even if I tried to live up to the aspiration that I envisioned in that title (not words of inspiration or motivational things), I don't know how sincere the so-called perk could be in my words. I mean, yes. I find people to be incredibly resilient, I marvel at how there are people who go in and out of relationships over and over and over again, and still move on to find love. Me, for myself, I can't imagine myself going through this again. It's about strength, and there are many people who show it after multiple unsuccessful runs, but I feel I don't have it in me to do it again.